Last night I had a really horrid dream. On the front of the newspaper was an article about the death of a friend I haven't seen in a while, but that I really care about. The article noted the cause as heart failure, but the way it was written implied a more specifically and purposefully self inflicted cause. I woke, upset and, obviously still half asleep and convinced by the vividness of my dream, checked news and social media. My friend is not dead. On falling back asleep my dream continued, though on a more obviously dream like thread. The death was some kind of sleight of hand, designed to enable some kinds of crazy time travelling scheme to save someone else for something. My friend would die and yet live infinitely in some kind of bizarre temporal loop. I told you it got more dream like. Despite their obvious good health, and the obviously dreamer substance of the second dream, I have a curious melancholy about me this morning, unable as I am to prevent myself from feeling the impact of a loss that never happened.
I hope everyone is okay today.
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